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May 03, 2006

01:46 AM - Ruined Music - call for submissions!

Hey everybody, this is a new project that Mary and I have started. Participate! Spread the word!

Ruined Music wants stories for its site launch/premiere/debut! Read on:

Breaking up is hard to do. There are tears and sleepless nights, decreased appetites, increased appetites for greasy takeout dumplings and/or vodka, items thrown at walls, packs of cigarettes smoked, embarrassing songs and/or poems and/or "editative essays" composed (at 3:50 a.m. while smoking said cigarettes), epic bouts of whining to be endured only by your closest confidantes and understanding pets. Then, of course, there are the horrible logistics of the breakup, which involve notifying friends, said friends taking sides, and finally, canvassing your apartment for items left behind or given as gifts by your ex. You must determine which items you should try to return and which you must throw away or burn in the bathtub. And then you collapse against the side of the bathtub and cry, because a) you can't believe you wasted so many precious weeks/months/years of your life with that evil bitch/bastard, or b) you can't believe your precious angel left you and now you are doomed to die alone. Or both.

But perhaps the worst thing about the breakup is the fact that music gets caught in the fallout. Everyone has a song, album, artist, or band that's been ruined by an ex (or, more accurately, by memories of an ex). Ruined Music is the place to talk about the music you've lost (or that's been taken from you by that evil bitch/bastard): the songs you can't stand to hear ever again, that record she always played when she was over at your house, the band you went to see together a week before he called it quits, That Song that was on That Mix, the record that was playing the night you (fill in the blank), the album you got for a Valentine's Day gift, wrapped in paper with hand-drawn hearts.

Ruined Music wants your stories. Tell us all about it. Feel better. Reclaim your records.

Guidelines? Right here:

-Please submit your story in the text of your email or as an attached Word document. Stories for the launch must be received by midnight, Monday May 8! The first three people to submit stories will receive a very special prize!

-Please include, at the top of each story, your name, email address, phone number, and the name of the song/artist/album you're writing about. (We won't publish your contact information. That's for us.)

-Please include, at the bottom of each story, a sentence or two about yourself and a URL if you have one. For example: "John Doe is a boring pseudonym who lives and surfs in La Jolla, California. He writes horrible poetry at sentimentalcrap.com."

-Keep it short. Under 1,000 words for sure.

-While it's fine to include some background details about your ex and the breakup to provide context for your ruined music, please don't get too explicit with names and identifying information. For example, do not write "I cannot listen to Prince ever since I got dumped by Ashley L. Wegman, that slut, I hear she's driving a blue Camry and working the night shift at the Cincinnati Airport Ramada Inn now."

-Please do not pepper your story with strange and possibly illegal expressions of threat and/or revenge.

-Remember, one person's misery is another person's guffaw. Make us chuckle.

-Email submissions to submit@ruinedmusic.com. Email questions, blueberry muffins, etc. to info@ruinedmusic.com.


Comments

I don't really have bad song associations, but I'm TRYING to think of something to write for yall, really.

posted by: Tina at May 3, 2006 11:26 AM


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